Chayei Sarah

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My son is getting old (not me). He just got his Torah portion for his Bar Mitzvah next year. He will be reading from Chayei Sarah.

Sarah dies and the beginning of the portion. It is about Abraham negotiating and buying some land that has caves. He tells the people that he would like to bury his wife there.

Here is a brief review from Wikipedia.

A burial place for Sarah

Sarah lived 127 years and died in Hebron, and Abraham mourned for her. (Genesis 23:1–2) Abraham asked the Hittites to sell him a burial site, and the Hittites invited him to bury his dead in the choicest of their burial places. (Genesis 23:3–6) Abraham asked the Hittites to intercede for him with Ephron son of Zohar to sell Abraham the cave of Machpelah at full price. (Genesis 23:7–9) Before the Hittites at the town gate, Ephron offered to give Abraham the field and the cave that was in it, but Abraham insisted on paying the price of the land. (Genesis 23:10–13) Ephron named the value of the land at 400 shekels of silver and Abraham accepted Ephron’s terms, gave him the silver, and purchased the land. (Genesis 23:14–18) Abraham buried Sarah in the cave. (Genesis 23:19)

The thing I am most excited about for my son is the opportunity to wrestle with the text. He is an excellent writer and likes to think deeply about serious issues. I think this will be an excellent challenge and I look forward to what he comes up with.

The biblical text for Genesis 23 in Hebrew and English can be found at mechon-mamre.org

You can listen to the Hebrew reading of Genesis 23 in Hebrew

Bedford: A Kippah Story

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It has been a while since I had a good kippah story.

Today I was coming home from work. I had the windows down and I was listening to the baseball reporter show.

A large man on a motorcycle pulled up next to me. At some point he tried to get my attention. I lowered the volume on my radio and turned toward him. He was saying something like “I do not know much about the Jewish religion, but do you where that all of the time or only on special holidays.”

I told him that I wear it all of the time but it is a choice. Some people do not where it at all. It is not an obligation or a commandment to do so.

He said thank you and he was just curious. The light turned green and we drove off.

What is your kippah story?

The Truth

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What is the truth?

Is there a single truth?

Does religion provide that truth?

Does the bible provide that truth?

How does one know what is the truth?

Does the truth matter?

So are these the same always telling the truth?

  • Stay far away from falsehood. – Exodus 23:7
  • Do not steal, do not deceive and do not lie to one another – Leviticus 19:11
  • Teach your tongue to say, “I do not know,” lest you be led to a lie – Babylonian Talmud, Berakhot 4a
  • One should not promise to give a child something and then not give it to him, because as a result, the child will learn to lie – Babylonian Talmud, Sukkah 46b

When is it appropriate to not tell the truth?

  • Great is peace, seeing that for its sake even God modified the truth. – Babylonian Talmud, Yevamot 65b
  • 3 angles come to visit Abraham and Sarah, who are 99 and 90 years old. They tell the patriarch that, within a year, his wife will give birth. Sarah, who is listening nearby, “laughed to herself, saying, ‘Now that I am withered, am I to have enjoyment, with me husband so old?’” In the next verse, God says to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh, saying, “Shall I in truth bear a child, old as I am?’” – Genesis 18:12-13 (Telushkin pg 59)
  • Our Rabbis taught: How does one dance [and what words does one say] before a bride? The School of Shammai says, “The bride [is described] as she is.” The School of Hillel says, “[Every bride is described as a] beautiful and graceful bride.” The School of Shammai said to the School of Hillel, “If she was lame or blind, does one say of her, ‘Beautiful and graceful bride’? Does not the Torah command, ‘Stay far away from falsehood’? (Exodus 23:7). But the School of Hillel answered the School of Shammai, “According to your words, if a person has made a bad purchase in the market, should one praise it to him or deprecate it? Surely one should praise it to him.” Therefor, the Tabbis teach, “Always should one’s disposition be pleasant with people.” – Babylonian Talmud, Ketubot 16b-17a
  • When a man is about to die, we tell him to recite the viduii (confession of sins). We say to him, “Many have said the confession and then not died, and many have not said the confession and died.” – Shulkhan Arukh, Yoreh Deah 338:1

Yiddish Proverbs

  • A half-truth is a whole lie.
  • Truth never dies but it lives a wretched life.

Talebearing – what if it is the truth?

  • Do not go about as a talebearer among your people. – Leviticus 19:16
  • The gossiper stands in Syria and kills in Rome – Palestinian Talmud, Peah 1:1
  • Don’t speak well of your friend, for although you will start with his good traits, the discussion might turn to his bad traits. –Babylonian Talmud, Bava Bathra 164b
  • Perhaps the least observed of the Torah’s 613 commandments, this law posits that it is forbidden to say something negative about another person, even if it is true, unless the person to whom you are speaking vitally needs the information (e.g. he or she is considering marrying, hiring, or going into business with the person about whom you are speaking). In Hebrew, such speech is known as “lashon hara” (literally, evil tongue). Jewish law also forbids slander, in Hebrew “motzi shem ra” (giving someone a bad name). – Telushikin, Jewish Wisdom pg 65

Leave you with Isaiah and his 6 principles – Isaiah 33:15-16

  1. He who walks in righteousness
  2. Who speaks honestly
  3. Who spurns profit form fraudulent dealings
  4. Who waves away a bribe instead of taking it
  5. Who closes his ears and doesn’t listen to malicious words
  6. Who shuts his eyes against looking at evil

Quotes from Joseph Telushkin’s Jewish Wisdom

Definitions:

Honesty refers to a facet of moral character and denotes positive, virtuous attributes such as integrity, truthfulness, and straightforwardness along with the absence of lying, cheating, or theft[1].

Truth can have a variety of meanings, such as the state of being in accord with a particular fact or reality, or being in accord with the body of real things, real events or actualities.[1] It can also mean having fidelity to an original or to a standard or ideal. In a common archaic usage it also meant constancy or sincerity in action or character. (Wikipedia lists 9 types of truth)

A lie (also called prevarication, falsehood) is a known untruth expressed as truth. A lie is a type of deception in the form of an untruthful statement, especially with the intention to deceive others, often with the further intention to maintain a secret or reputation, protect someone’s feelings or to avoid a punishment or repercussion for one’s actions. To lie is to state something that one knows to be false or that one does not honestly believe to be true with the intention that a person will take it for the truth. A liar is a person who is lying, who has previously lied, or who tends by nature to lie repeatedly – even when not necessary. (Wikipedia lists 21 types of lying)

Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods. –Albert Einstein

Book: Hineni in Our Lives

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Hineni in Our Lives by Norman J. Cohen

I read, for the second time, the first 2 chapters of this book and came away annoyed and perhaps mad.

The moral and practical takeaways of the midrashim are fabulous. I like the idea of hineni. Maybe in our sacred community that is what we should be saying when someone wants to talk to us. “Hineni”, then with full attention turn your body to the person and listen and engage – remove all else and focus on that person. Maybe just start at home and do it with our spouse and children. This is something I would like to try and practice.

However … The rationalization of the binding of Issac in this book I am not going to practice or repeat.

The analysis is infuriating. The analysis makes the binding of Isaac story apologetic. That somehow it is OK from a moral standpoint to take your kid up to the mountain to sacrifice him. The analysis does not do much with the problem it just twists it to a solution for today. So I learn that “hineni” is important with our loved ones and in relationships. Abraham says hineni to G-d then to his son and that is all good for the takeaway.

However, if you are going down this path and trying to map this to today’s world there is a big elephant in the room that is not being acknowledged. If you were to hear the voice of G-d and bring your son to sacrifice – it is not a personal sacrifice – it is insanity (we are not biblical heroes). The leap from taking what Abraham does and rationalizing beyond the the story in which we should struggle with is very difficult.

It does not matter in the morals of today or those in past. If you hear G-d’s voice and want to kill your child there is a much larger relationship issue you need to work with. Rationalizing the story for this relationship takeaway is morally infuriating for me. The midrash should have stopped with the first hineni, bringing the second hineni (I am here, my son) into the midrash overshadows the point being made.